Let My Testicles Go!

Read the saga of poor Testicles (pronounced like 'Pericles') here.

“Testaclese” tipped the scales when he approached the university Provost, Edward J. Kavanagh, outside the student union. Apparently taking him/it for a giant mushroom, Provost Kavanagh cheerfully greeted him. But when Testaclese presented him with an honorary award as a campus “Penis Warrior,” the stunned official realized that it was no mushroom. After this incident, which was recorded on videotape, the promoters of P-Day were ordered to cease circulating their flyers and to keep Testaclese off campus grounds. Mindful of how school officers had never once protested any of the antics of Vagina warriors, the P-warriors did not comply. The Testaclese costume was then confiscated and formal charges followed.

It seems someone has locked up the poor Testicles of the Penis Warriors. Perhaps in Hillary Clinton's lockbox.

Note to whomever decided on the spelling of the name -- Pericles is not Peraclese, and Testicles is not Testacles.