I WOULD request one of these . . .
. . . free quick-dry Marines T-shirts.
But I envision a couple of months from now, a midnight knock at more door would come.
And when I answered it, a couple of burly thicknecks would drag me off and scold me that I should have read the fine print more closely because I am now the property of Uncle Sam.
"Did you enjoy your T-shirt, enlistee?"
But even then, I might request it if the hot Marine in the picture came (don't say "on!" Whatever you do, don't say "on"!) with the shirt.
But that probably wouldn't happen. So I'll pass.
P.S. "Musician Opportunities?"