Government in action.

Ducks banned from pond.

How do you teach a duck to read a "No Ducks Allowed" sign? If a duck violates the ban, do you fine him? Isn't a duck of diminished mental capacity, so he doesn't understand the consequences of violating the law? Will the Twinkie Defense be replaced with the "I Am A Duck" Defense?

And, of course, there's this:

" . . .The main problem with ducks is that if you relocate them there is nothing to stop them from flying back."