Oh, look . . .

. . . the Cubs are undefeated again.

Ankiel pulls a Reverse Dascenzo*.

Cards pitcher becomes outfielder.

* - For those of you wondering what a Reverse Dascenzo is, take a look at outfielder Doug Dascenzo's 0.00 ERA when Zim would put him in to pitch during throwaway Cubbies innings. The best pitcher in the league that year was an outfielder. This is the stuff of legend. If he was a Klingon, songs would be sung about him.

Note to Roger Clemens . . .

. . . you looked so good in Astros Red.

Beefy guys who wear white look like the Michelin Man.

Good luck, though.

At least now I won't be so conflicted about being both a Cubbies fan AND a Roger Clemens fan. I guess I *do* need an AL team to root for, even if that league doesn't play real baseball. Years back, I tried a while to be a White Sox fan, but that didn't work out so well. And now you can whoop up on those perpetual whiners, the Red Sox, who built any success they might have not on improving their own team, but on bitching to MLB about other teams improving THEIRS. They are the ones who brought socialism to baseball.

Go Yankees!