SO over that, week of July 30 '07.

These three things I am SO over.

1. Energy drinks. They cost too much, taste like gnome pee, and are full of carbs. Gimme a couple cups of joe. Or a Jolt Cola.
2. “Finding myself.” I know where I am. I’m right here, ploinking away at the keyboard. Men who wonder where their selves are can usually find them in the Lost and Pussy department.
3. Janeanne Garofolo. The jaded, unhappy Theater Major act was marginally cool when you were, like, nineteen, Janeanne. Go marry Mark Ruffalo and get one of those hyphenated feminist last names. Maybe if you’d get some, you’d lighten up.

SO OVER THAT: Week of July 23 '07.

These three things I am SO over.

1.Those lame DirecTV commercials featuring movie clips where the actor pitches DirecTV in the middle of the scene. At least they could do some INTERESTING movie scenes. Like the ear scene in Reservoir Dogs. Or the squealy scene in Deliverance.

2.Products that deliberately misspell their names because Market Research apparently views illiteracy as trendy and eye-catching.

3.David Beckham, aka Mr. Posh Spice. Football is that sport they play in America and Australia. What you play, Mr. Spice, is soccer. Rugby is more footbally than soccer is.

So Over That -- Third week of July '07 edition.

These three things I am SO over.

1. TV shows that think they are clever for realizing "Grace" can mean "grace," but it could also be a girls name! The first time was clever . . . marginally. Every time since then has been unoriginal and lame. You want clever? Try Douched by an Angel! Now THAT's clever!

2. Candidates who bitch about the inclusion of other candidates in debates. Clinton and Edwards need to save the drama for Obama!

3. Sepia-toned pictures. "Black and white" means "BLACK and white," not "CRAP-COLORED and white!"